[sandy]

ok....just my way of communicating folks.....if ya' can't poke fun at yourself what good is breathing....so for those of you who think my post has something to do with fighting or that I'm Japanese allow me to clear things up....I apply the term "Kung Fu" to anything that I want to exagerate the size of....like large Emeralds or Diamonds on a lady in a Harry Winston or Cariter AD!.....I'm a masculine German/American model type guy who has been blessed with pretty good genes.....have always been considered very handsome by anyone's standards....still have a very nicely developed muscular body....huge calfs that every guy wants to smack me in the head for because I don't even have to excercise them and they still look the same as when I was 18....I used to have a killer behind....my high school girlfriend called me "buns", ok?, get the picture?....for some reason after I turned 40, I have had the worst time trying to hold onto those buns (or buttocks, as it were)....the new GF is a big "ass WOman" and has been giving me the hardest time about my lack of one for the past 3 years....I am NOT an advoacte of fillers of any kind and would have surgery to correct someting before I would ever inject someting into my body; including my face......however, I have heard that implants for the buttocks are not so safe and that they can in fact break or leak once implanted.....mostly because of the fact that they get alot of abuse from people who sit around all day on their asses and don't do a whole lot (like me).....or "car asses" like me who would rather drive the store on the corner than walk to it......SO....is it Hydrogel or Implants folks?.....I'm opting for the Hydrogel as I am afraid to suffer the future consequences of a problem with implants......my questions about Hydrogel are:

1.)Does the process last?

2.)How many procedures does it require to "get it right"?

3.)How painful is the procedure

4.)How natural looking is the procedure?

5.)Will my ASS look like a mans (or a womans) after the procedure?

6.)What kind of professional should I choose to do this procedure?

7.)Should I stay in NYC (where I live) to have the procedure done or fly to Switzerland and rent a chateau next to Elizabeth Taylor's in Gstaad!?

8.)How long after the procedure before I can sit for long periods of time on my ASS and do nothing?

9.)How long can I sit for one period of time on a plane or in a car before I am rushed to the hiney store for more?

10.)Will my GF be able to continue to slap the goods around down the road without causing my ass to look like I was rear ended with a shopping cart (like it looks now)?

11.)Any other answers to question about Hydrogel that I might have left out here?